• dr. tortoise

two nights in february

It was hump day night. I was as sober as Pre-K out here. I had just woken up and was going to work, so the day was pretty much over. Last night wasn’t anything crazy. But we somehow stayed up till around 7. I shitly walk down u street with a coffee in my hand. They don’t tell you this, but sleep is important, in fact it is essential. Hopefully I’ll get some rest tonight. There’s always another day to be productive. Although now I’m not so sure, the days seemed numbered, the corona virus is spreading quickly. I see hand sanitizer everywhere, in the club, at joe and the juice, and sold out in stores. I overheard on the radio the other day that we should all have around 6 months’ worth of savings. Ya, everyone’s DEFINTELY got that. I feel like it might turn into world war z on these streets if it gets that bad and no one’s getting paid. Also released the other day that there is another strain of “covid-19” kinda like how weed has sativa and indica but this is a more aggressive version of the previous. This might be the end of days here, suck in that cigarette, life’s short, said seth rogen once upon a time. Like I said, we were up all night trying to figure out life. We smoked cigs back to back in the sunroom. We went for a walk then watched shameless and got wired up on caffeine help us say; fuck it theres no time like now… at around two in the morning. I wasn’t ready for the bike ride up ahead my friend wanted. I scurried home and tapped out but it felt as though my eyes were fluttering all night from nespresso, espresso, and more espresso. My friend asked me just last night in a sad tone if we were all going to get the virus. Indifferent I answered

“ya probably… but its only like… Old people and people who have underlying medical conditions who are actually dying from it”

“that kinda sucks”

In the time I took to write this (a few days) its seems to have gotten much worse. All I know is that I know nothing said one of those philosophers. I read one thing the mayor says. Then what the president says, Then that “doctor” on the radio. I don’t know I’ve read so much about it I’m not sure what’s what. Every day it looks like its getting to this sort of modern apocalypse, I think there was a brawl at Costco over water, or was it toiler paper? I know which companies I need to invest in haha. Now I’ve realized I should have prepared like the other billionaires. With a bunker under my house and indulging in my second amendment right. My brother, who lives in south America, says he doesn’t want to visit because he might die. My mom told him

“okay. well. leave me inheritance”

“okay. I got the motorcycle and a couple tvs”

“okay, well get all the paperwork done”

“Yeah I’ll do it.”

Anyway where was I? I’m walking down U and notice a lot of middle school year old girls. What is this? This is no place for them. Never mind, I went to minding my own business muttering to myself. I asked one of their mothers who looked lost where they were going. Startled she said

“Oh! U street music hall”

“Oh yeah, its further down. What show is tonight?”

The little girl barged in and said

“Audrey Mika”

“Oh yeah!!!”

I don’t know who that is. And why am I talking to you? I feel like where all equal but specifically meaning gender and age. But if the world hasn’t ever taught me anything, ageism is real, and men should not talk to underage girls. I was going to see this indie… bedroom… pop… rock… girl… tonight, if I wanted to or not. More rare girls were crowded at the entrance. I shouldn’t have been here. There was no reason for for any adults to be here. Or any bartenders for that matter. Fan girls lined up excitingly to meet their idol, exchange a few words, and take cute pictures. I can’t remember who I would have been ga ga for in those days. I stood in the back and I couldn’t believe all the virgins in here. Alll the prepubescent energy mad eme feel uncomfortable like when you first grow hair on your pits. The opener was… who knows, it didn’t matter, he wasn’t good. He rapped about “bitches that didn’t text back” talking like he was something other than white and mimicked mac miller’s steez. His music was hardly rap and awful pop and it looked as though he was barely singing into the mic letting the song play behind him. Whatevah he’s more successful than me! The main act looked like this girl that was no more than 16. I honestly thought I wouldn’t like it. But I was awfully confused. She sang beautifully and had a strong voice. She talked had a positive and down to earth aura, asking the crowd who deals with anxiety, her included. My favorite was the trippy ballad “BANANA PANCAKES IN THE DESERT.” Her music was vaguely rhythms and blues and her live drum and guitar was a nice touch. I think she’s giving jorja a run for her money. I asked this older woman what she was doing here. She was probably only twenty four but compared to the crowd. In hindsight it sounded a bit offensive but I didn’t mean it that way I was just childishly curious. She dodged it by saying something like …

“I found her on Youtube.”

“oh… okay?”

It was the end of the night finally and people were lining up to meet her and buy her merch. Then there was the few that wanted to take pic with the opener. but I didn’t see the point. Maybe I’m just jealous haha. I feel like music and art is so accessible to make that everyone thinks they can do it. And its up to us honest ones to speak up. Some would say that’s being a hater. I still can’t believe I didn’t know about here before.

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